1 Peter Study #7

“Is Peter Picking on the Women?”

1 Peter 3:1-6

Study #7 in 1 Peter Series

INTRODUCTION:

We have all heard the criticisms from woke feminists, and even some who self-identify as Christian women, who say that the Bible is misogynistic. They point to the treatment of women in the Old Testament and find fault with the patriarchal system of the Israelites. In the New Testament they especially dislike the Apostle Paul who they say was outspokenly anti-woman, seeking to keep women out of leadership roles in the church and demanding that they take a backseat to men in general, but especially in the home. For this reason, many modern women, and some men, have rejected certain passages in the Scriptures, claiming them to be anachronistic and obsolete. They say that those parts were just Paul’s opinion and are no longer binding on us in the modern Church because our culture has evolved beyond those primitive ideas. Therefore, they promote an egalitarian theology that says that men and women are equals in every way, and that there are no longer any gender-specific roles in the church.   

TRANSITION:

But are they correct? Has everything changed? Our text for today’s study is one of those passages that the feminists hate and berate. Although not written by Paul, the guy they claim to be the Bible’s #1 Woman-Hater, it was written by his pal, the Apostle Peter. In these six (6) verses Peter singles out the women of the churches and lays some heavy teaching on them about how they should think, dress, act, adorn themselves, and submit to their husbands. However, what many of these critics fail to understand is that these teachings are couched in a broader context about Christian submission incumbent on all believers: men, women, servants, leaders, everyone. Peter is not picking on the women!    

NOTES on the Text:

Verses 1-2: In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the Word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, ² as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.  

• “In the same way…” – This phrase is important for our understanding of how to interpret these verses in context. Chapter 2 begins by reminding us of who we have become in Christ. We have been changed by God. We are living stones in God’s Temple. We are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, and a people for God’s own possession. Because of this the world scrutinizes us with curiosity, criticism, and consternation. They are always watching to see if we screw up and fail to live up to our claims of being God’s kids. So, in verse 13 Peter begins talking about how important it is for us to submit ourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution—to kings, governors, police officers, etc. Then in verse 18 Peter turns his attention to Christian slaves, exhorting them likewise to submit themselves for the Lord’s sake to their masters, whether they were good men or not. As Christians in that society, they needed to live exemplary lives, even though they were slaves. Then Peter shifts his focus and brings up Jesus Christ who is our example in every facet of life. He explains that Christ submitted Himself to the will of the Father and came to earth to die for sinners. He established the pattern, the template for Christians in all places and in all times to live in submission to God and to the people that God loves. We are called to submit ourselves for the Lord’s sake, no matter what our station in life might be. That brings us to 3:1 where Peter says, “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands…” Notice that Peter says that wives are called to submit to their own husbands but not to all men in a general sense. Male headship is God’s commanded principle for the home and the church, albeit not for society in general. And just a few verses later, in verse 7, he turns the spotlight on their husbands saying, “You husbands in the same way…”
• The principle of submission is applied to many different groups in the New Testament:

o   Jesus submitted to His parents (Luke 2:51).

o   Citizens must submit to government authorities (Rom. 13:1-5, Titus 3:1, 1 Pet. 2:13).

o   The universe submits to Jesus (1 Cor. 15:27, Eph. 1:22).

o   Christians must submit to their church leaders (1 Cor. 16:15-16, 1 Peter 5:5).

o   Wives must submit to their husbands (Col. 3:18, Titus 2:5, 1 Pet. 3:5, Eph. 5:22-24).

o   Children must submit to their parents (Eph. 6:1-3, Col. 3:20)

o   The church must submit to the Lord Jesus (Eph. 5:24).

o   Servants must submit to their masters (Titus 2:9, 1 Peter 2:18).

o   Christians must submit to God (Hebrews 12:9, James 4:7).

·       But notice that none of these relations are ever reversed. For example, masters are never told to submit to servants, Jesus is never told to submit to the Church, and so forth. So, while there must be a servant-like love and attitude on the part of those in positions of authority, that does not eliminate the concept of God’s order of authority and the corresponding submission.

• So, you see, everybody gets their turn. Peter is not just picking on the ladies. So now let’s go back and unpack what Peter is actually saying to the women. “…you wives, be submissive to your own husbands” – The verb here translated as “be submissive” is the Greek word ὑποτάσσω (hupotasso), a compound verb made up of the preposition ὑπό (hupo or hypo) meaning “under, beneath, below” and the verb τάσσω (tasso) meaning “to arrange, to put in order, to station.” When we parse this verb in the sentence, we see that it is a present passive participle, which means that wives are to do this themselves on a continuing basis. It is not something imposed on them but rather it is an attitude they choose to take toward their husbands. With all that in mind the literal translation of the sentence goes like this: “You wives, put yourself under, submit yourself to, line yourself up behind your own husbands.”
• A note in the Blue Letter Bible says: This word, hupotasso, was a Greek military term meaning “to arrange [troop divisions] in a military fashion under the command of a leader.” In non-military use, it was “a voluntary attitude of obeying, giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, and carrying a burden.”
• “…so that even if any of them are disobedient to the Word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, ² as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.” – Here Peter explains why it is important that wives submit themselves to their own husbands; namely, to win them to Christ. For reasons that I do not fully understand it seems that more women respond to the Gospel than men. Since the days of the Early Church until now it seems that women are more open to believe in Christ and to turn to Him than are the men. That was true in Peter’s time, just as it is in ours. Looking back on my 50+ years of ministry I have counselled many Christian wives married to unsaved husbands, but very few believing husbands married to unbelieving wives. It’s strange but true.
• “…so that even if any of them are disobedient to the Word” – Notice that Peter does not differentiate here between a non-Christian husband and one who may be a believer but is not walking in obedience with Christ. The same principle applies in either case: the wife’s godly character and godly life are a powerful duo that God can use to bring her husband into alignment with the Word. And Peter makes the claim that her consistent godly life and her submissive attitude toward her husband, despite his apparent disinterest in the Gospel or the Christian faith, is a Christian wife’s most powerful tool to win her husband to the Lord. But notice the phrase, “…that they may be won without a word.” Wives are not to try and talk their husbands into Heaven by constantly nagging, harping, and arguing with him. That is like kryptonite; it will drive him away. Rather, it is by him observing her “chaste and respectful behavior” that he will be drawn to Christ, finally desiring to have what she has.
• Just a quick sidenote…The King James Version translation of this verse says, “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the Word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives.” This verse has caused much confusion for many years because of the word, “conversation.” The phrase preceding it is great, “…[that] they also may without the word be won…” But then comes that next phrase. What people need to understand is that in King James’ era the word “conversation” did not mean speaking but rather your entire manner of life, what we today call your lifestyle. From then until now the word has totally changed its meaning. Peter is not telling the wives they should try to talk their husbands into the Kingdom of God. That pretty much always backfires.   

Verse 3: Your adornment must not be merely external – braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;

• “Your adornment must not be merely external” – Peter is not against external adornment. The key word to notice here is “merely.” Every woman looks better when she is clean, with her hair washed and well groomed, perhaps with some jewelry and a little makeup. Peter mentions braiding the hair, which was in fashion in his day. He also speaks of wearing gold jewelry and pretty dresses. There is nothing wrong with any of these things. They are simply ways to enhance the woman’s natural beauty and attractiveness.
• Peter’s concern is that Christian women, and men too, understand that true beauty, nobility, and godliness come from the inside, and are not merely painted on the outside. A woman can be drop-dead beautiful on the outside but be filthy and immoral on the inside. A man can be handsome, well-groomed and well-dressed and still be a dirty, rotten scoundrel and a murderer. For Christians, men and women alike, we should be more concerned with what is on the inside and make sure that is good, and godly and truly commendable. 1 Samuel 16:7 is a good example: But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his [Saul’s] appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”   

Verse 4: …but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. 

• “…but let it be the hidden person of the heart” – Only God can fully know what we are on the inside, but when we are around a person for a while we can pick up clues about what they are really like. Oh yes, sometimes we can be fooled for a while, but sooner or later the rottenness will become evident. But in the same way, genuine godliness shines out of a Christian’s life, becoming evident through their loving words, kind actions, and righteous attitudes.
• “…with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” – In context Peter is talking about godly wives who demonstrate “a gentle and quiet spirit” especially in their homes. He claims that this “imperishable quality” will be instrumental in bringing their unbelieving and disobedient husbands to faith in Christ. “Imperishable” means that it does not decay or worsen with age. Instead, imperishable beauty only gets better with age and is therefore of much greater value than the beauty that comes from beautiful hairdos, expensive jewelry, or fancy clothes.
• But I must give you a caution here. Do not take these verses as a promise. Rather, Peter is giving us a principle, a truth that has been proven reliable time and time again. But it is like the OT proverb that says, “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Some parents glom onto that verse like a lifeline and claim it as a promise, then get mad at God when their kid turns out to be a drug-dealing sex-crazed criminal in prison on a 45-year sentence. That verse is a proverb, not a promise. It is a truism, meaning that it is more often true than not, but still subject to the human will of the people involved. The same is true of this passage in 1 Peter. I have known godly Christian wives who have hoped and prayed for decades that their husbands would get saved but they never did, but their individual experience still does not diminish the truth of this passage.
• “…which is precious in the sight of God.” – Even if the husband never comes around to repent of his sins and turn to Christ Peter’s argument is still valid. A godly woman living to please her Heavenly Father despite getting no spiritual support from her husband is still precious in God’s sight, and she will one day be rewarded for her faithfulness. 

Verse 5: For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;

• “For in this way in former times the holy women also…” – Peter here reminds Christian women that he is not calling them to some new standard but to the same obedience that was practiced by holy women of former times, referring I think to godly women in the Old Testament. He is just reminding them that when Christian women submit to their husbands and do not rely on their outward adornment to give their lives meaning and value, they are like the holy women of the past who trusted in God and demonstrated their faith through their inward beauty rather than through physical adornments. 

Verse 6: …just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him “lord,” and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.  

• “…just as Sarah obeyed Abraham” – Peter had many Old Testament examples of godly wives that he could have chosen: Rebeckah and Isaac, Rachel and Jacob, Ruth and Boaz, Hannah and Elkanah, Abigail and David, Esther and King Xerxes, etc. But he chose to focus on Sarah, the wife of Abraham. Although she was not a perfect woman nor a perfect wife, Sarah demonstrated her submission to her husband in at least two important ways: First, she obeyed Abraham even when it was difficult and even when he was wrong, as was the case in Genesis 12:10-20. Second, Peter says that she honored Abraham by calling him “lord.” Of course, it is possible to obey someone without showing them the honor that is part of submission. However, true submission includes both obedience and honor. Sarah embodied this truth in her relationship with Abraham.

·       “…and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.” – In other words, you have become like her, almost like her daughters, if you treat your husbands in the same way that she treated Abraham. True submission, motivated by faith in God, has no room for fear or terror. It does what is right and leaves the result to God, knowing that God rewards those who walk in obedience to Him. The words “if you do what is right” remind us that true biblical submission is not a grumbling surrender to authority but is an active embrace of God’s will, demonstrating confidence in Him.

CONCLUSION:

I hope you will see that this paragraph about the importance of Christian wives choosing to submit to their husbands for the Lord’s sake is just one piece of a much larger argument that all believers are to live in submission to Christ and to other people. The principles in these verses apply to men as well as to women. Peter is not picking on the ladies. 

I also hope that you will understand that in our own strength none of us can subdue our flesh and live a life of biblical submission. We can only do this through the power of the Holy Spirit and by keeping our eyes focused on Jesus who is our example. He modeled a life of submission, submitting His will to the Father, and laying down His life for us. He left us an example, that we should walk in His steps.