1 Timothy Series - Part 11

“Widows, and Widows Indeed – Part 2”

1 Timothy 5:9-16 (Message #11 in 1 Timothy Series)

INTRODUCTION:

            There are people who believe that the apostle Paul had it out for women, that he was a woman-hater, a real misogynist. That is not true, however. Taken together, the writings of Paul prove that he held women in highest esteem in his mind, and had many solid friendships with women.

            However, in the period during which Paul lived, the 1^st Century AD, what we often refer to as the Early Church period, women were at a great disadvantage in general. A single woman was normally expected to live with her parents. If her parents died she might go to live with a brother or some other relative. She certainly could not live alone, on her own, because she would have no source of income, unless she chose to sell her body.

            In the case of a widow, she could easily find herself in an equally precarious position with few options. If she were a slave, or if her husband had no estate to leave to her, she was just plain out of luck. There were no social services in those days, no welfare, no jobs for women, and no low-cost subsidized housing.

TRANSITION:

            That is why the church stepped in to help. The Christians of the Early Church understood from the Scriptures that besides spreading the Gospel, making disciples, and planting churches, part of their mandate was to care for widows and orphans. They took this very seriously, and so did the apostle Paul.

            Here in 1 Timothy Paul lays down some practical teaching about how the church was to carry out this mission. Last Sunday we looked at 1 Timothy 5:1-8 in which Paul introduces this subject. Today we pick up where we left off with Part 2 of this study that I have entitled, “Widows, and Widows Indeed.” You will remember from last week that Paul describes two kinds of widows: (1) Those with some financial resources and family connections so that they can take care of themselves; and (2) Those he calls, “widows indeed,” who are alone in the world and destitute, depending on the love and kindness of God’s people just to put bread in their stomachs. I told you that the churches had a list of the widows they were caring for to help them keep track of who was who. You will see that as we begin our study for today. 

MAIN BODY:

Verse 9: A widow is to be put on the list only if she is not less than sixty years old, having been the wife of one man, 

• “…to be put on the list” So what does this tell you? It tells you that the church had a list. They kept records. They had a roll of members as well as a roll of widows that they were caring for and supporting. And apparently, the widows on that list were expected to devote themselves to prayer (cf. verse 5) and to good deeds (cf. verse 10). Today there are people who believe that churches should not have membership, that anyone and everyone should have a say in what goes on in the church. That view is both naïve and also born out of ignorance of church history. The church has always had membership requirements and lists.
• “…to be put on the list only if she is not less than sixty years old” In other words, she had to be at least 60 to be put on the list of widows.  You are just 58 or 59? Sorry, lady!
• “…having been the wife of one man” This phrase brings up the same issue we came across back in 3:2 where Paul gives the requirements for elders, and in 3:12 speaking of deacons. You will find disagreement here among scholars, although the Greek grammatical construction is the same in all three passages and all three, in my opinion, have nothing to do with how many times the person has been married but rather, with the quality of their marital fidelity. I told you before that the literal translation of 3:2 and 3:12 is that elders and deacons are both to be “one-woman men,” that is, totally devoted and faithful to their wives.  It is all about character, not how many times you have been to the altar. Now here in 5:9 you have the exact same Greek construction except that it refers to women instead of men. Paul says that the only women who should be put on the widows’ list are women who have proven themselves to be “one-man women.” Again, I believe that the issue for Paul was faithful godly character, not marital history of how many times the woman had been married. However, you are free to disagree.

Verse 10: …having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.    

• Notice that in verses 9-10 Paul mentions eight (8) qualities the church was to look for in these women before putting them on the list to receive financial support from the congregation:

1.       She must be over 60 years of age at a minimum

2.      She must have proven character of faithfulness to her spouse

3.      She must have a reputation for good works

4.      She must have experience raising children [her own or maybe orphans]

5.      She must have a track record of showing hospitality to strangers

6.      She must have a history of humble selfless service to others [NOTE: The phrase, “if she has washed the saints’ feet” is to be taken more figuratively than literally, although she very well may have done that too. This was usually a servant’s job, so for this woman to do it would mean that she had humbly put herself in the position of a servant in relation to the other believers in the church.]

7.       She must have a history of going to the aid of those in distress or adversity

8.      She must be known for devoted acts of kindness, having a commitment to serving.

Verses 11-12: But refuse to put younger widows on the list, for when they feel sensual desires in disregard of Christ, they want to get married, ¹² thus incurring condemnation, because they have set aside their previous pledge. 

• Let’s look at verse 12 first: “…thus incurring condemnation, because they have set aside their previous pledge.” What “previous pledge” is Paul talking about? As I mentioned a moment ago, when a woman was put on the list to receive financial support from the church she was asked to agree to devote herself to ministry to the congregation and the community. In a sense she became an extension of the church, giving her time and energy to prayer and to good deeds on behalf of others. This was a vow before the Lord and before the congregation, thus, it was to be taken very seriously. A literal translation of this verse goes something like this: “…having judgment seeing that they displace the first faith.” The implication is that in their desire to remarry, some go off with a man who is not a believer, thus bringing judgment on themselves for a clear and deliberate violation of Scripture with regard to not being unequally yoked with a non-Christian. And frankly, this is a very common scenario, even in our day.  Many young widows, despite being counselled and warned, have jumped from the frying pan into the fire when they went ahead and got remarried to a “nice” unbeliever, and then lived to regret it.
• Listen to me: It is never OK for a Christian to marry a non-Christian. NEVER. God will never tell you to do it. He will never bless you for doing it. He will never change the rules just for you. It will always be considered rebellion and disobedience if you go ahead with it.  And by the way, do not ask me to the wedding because I have already seen enough train wrecks. I do not need to witness another one just because you think that you are the exception to God’s rule. 
• Now go back and look at verse 11 again: “But refuse to put younger widows [younger than 60] on the list, for when they feel sensual desires in disregard of Christ, they want to get married, ¹² thus incurring condemnation…” Now do not jump to conclusions here…Paul is not talking about eternal damnation because she changed her mind and decided to get married. He is talking about another kind of condemnation, the judgment of men, of the church, not God. He means that this will lead to people seeing the woman in a bad light and possibly ruining her reputation.
• You can see how this might happen. A younger widow, still in the grief stages after losing her husband, willingly dedicates herself to serving in the church, concluding in her grief that she will remain a widow until the end of her days. Her service for Christ and His Church provides an outlet that aids in her healing. Later on, however, she grows lonely for male companionship and dreams of once again having a husband to love her. She grows restless and dissatisfied and concludes that she has made a terrible mistake by signing her life away to serve the church. Eventually she reneges on her vow and remarries, opening herself up to all sorts of criticism, especially if she marries an unbeliever.
• By the way, this text has been used for centuries by the Roman Catholic Church as their basis for the practice of women joining a convent and becoming nuns. They enter as “novices” and serve until they are absolutely certain that this is the life for them. Then they take their vows, which are for life. To later change her mind and leave the convent, a nun is criticized and is considered to have broken her vow to Christ. This is sort of what Paul had in mind here, but not exactly, because the Early Church did not have such a rigid system of “orders.”

Verse 13: At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention. 

• Paul seems to think that these younger widows might not have enough to do to keep them busy and out of trouble. I am assuming that Paul has some real cases in mind as he is writing this. I doubt that this is purely theoretical. I think he had actually seen this kind of behaviour with his own eyes. He warns Timothy and the Ephesian church to be very careful about who they put on the widows’ support list, because if they get the wrong people on there it is going to result in all kinds of trouble.
• Americans all know that the welfare system in the United States has created a subclass of people who have become welfare-system dependent.  Once on the list they lose all interest in hard work. They refuse to look for a job. They sit around watching Netflix and eating bonbons. Paul says, “…they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies…” Of course he’s not talking about people on welfare exactly, but apparently for some of the widows, they used and abused the church’s generosity the way some people use and abuse our society’s generosity.

Verses 14-15: Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach; ¹⁵ for some have already turned aside to follow Satan. 

• So, Paul says that the younger widows should remarry, have kids, become homemakers and live godly lives in the context of Christian marriage. That is, after all, God’s first and foremost plan. Singleness is the exception, not the rule. You may remember that Paul already dealt with this subject in 1 Corinthians 7:39, “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.” 
• “…and give the enemy no occasion for reproach” Paul talked earlier in this letter about the fact that Christians, and especially leaders, should live “above reproach,” meaning that they should live in such a way as to provide no occasion for Satan or unbelievers to find legitimate things for which to criticize them. I think that Paul has the same thing in mind here.
• “…for some have already turned aside to follow Satan.” What in the world does he mean by this? Why would Paul say such a thing about young widows who decide to get married again? What is so bad about that, for crying out loud? Again, in context I think that Paul is talking about a young widow who disregards the Lord’s command and goes ahead and marries an unbeliever. Anytime we say NO to God and YES to our own passions and desires we are siding with the devil. Any act of disobedience to God and His Word is a form of rebellion, the very sin that got Satan thrown out of Heaven. So, if you disobey and rebel against God you have “already turned aside and are following after Satan,” pure and simple. This offends our 21^st Century ears and modern sensibilities but Paul is not worried about offending straying sheep. He is concerned with waking them up to avoid the disastrous pitfall of disregarding God’s clear instruction.

Verse 16: If any woman who is a believer has dependent widows, she must assist them and the church must not be burdened, so that it may assist those who are widows indeed. 

• If you have the KJV you will notice that this verse reads a little differently in your Bible: “If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged.”  However, the words “…man or…” are not found in the best manuscripts, but unfortunately were added by the KJV translators.
• You see, Paul here is talking about a Naomi/Ruth type of situation where a widowed mother with some financial resources is watching over her widowed daughter or daughter-in-law; or perhaps a widowed mother-in-law, like Naomi, is supporting her widowed daughters-in-law, like Ruth and Orpah. As long as she has the wherewithal to do it, Paul says that she should support her own family members rather than shifting that responsibility onto the local church. This is perfectly in line with the principle he gave us up in verse 8 of this chapter: “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” 

CONCLUSION:

            So what is the take-away from this passage? What principles can we glean from these verses, especially if we are not widows? Is there anything here for the rest of us? Several things:

1. The church is to help those who are genuinely in need, but not everyone who appears at the gate is a real candidate to receive financial assistance. Nowadays, people go from church to church, mooching anything they can get in order to not have to do a day’s work. We have no obligation to help them continue their bad choices and bad behaviour and should not feel guilty saying, “No.” This is where we the elders of the church have to seek wisdom from God so that they do not become facilitators of bad behaviour and bad choices.
2. “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop.” That is an old expression that fits with what Paul is teaching here. If Christians stay busy doing the Lord’s work they will not have enough time or energy to get into much trouble. We all, including widows, need to be about our Father’s business. This is in part so that we will not fall into what Paul speaks of in verse 14: “…and give the enemy no occasion for reproach.” We all need to live in such a way that we leave no opportunity for the devil or the enemies of the Gospel to find a “gotcha.” 
3. There is no place in Christianity for being a freeloader. The Bible says that those who do not work should also not eat (2 Thess. 3:10). Moreover, any Christian who refuses to care for his family due to laziness or sloth, actually denies the faith by his attitude and behaviour. That is strong language, but again, God’s Word does not pull any punches! In God’s sight, “if anyone does not provide for his own family he has denied the faith and is worse than an infidel” (5:8). The world should never be able to lay eyes on a lazy Christian. These should be as rare as the famed extinct Dodo Bird.